Category: Life

  • Money is not the root of evil

    Money is not the root of evil

    Money is nothing more than a tool.

    It’s a means to an end, not a motivation in itself.

    Even its accumulation through miserliness, or its wastage through extravagance still makes it nothing more than a tool to achieve a greater goal.

    Ingratitude is what results in such tools being used to our detriment, or to the detriment of others.

    Money in the hands of an ingrate is used to harm others, or the self.

    Ingratitude is therefore the demon that we must learn to understand if we hope to use money in a way that creates a fulfilled life.

    Ingratitude is born of the belief that we are entitled to things or outcomes.

    That sense of entitlement is based on our need to feel validated by such privilege, because we see it as a measure of how much we mean to others.

    Our need for such validation is from a lack of appreciation for who we are and what our unique contribution to this world can be, and instead, a fixation on everything that we don’t have.

    Understand the source of your ingratitude, and tools like money will carry with it benefits and blessings in ways you never thought possible, without contaminating your ego in the process.

  • What do you see in the mirror?

    What do you see in the mirror?

    Given how easily we can change how we present ourselves to others through social media these days, it’s important to remember how much of our authenticity has to be sacrificed in the process.

    Be true to yourself, online and offline, and you won’t need filters to make your life or yourself appear to be different from your reality.

    We convince ourselves, sometimes of truths and sometimes of delusions of who we are.

    When it’s a delusion, we forget that in the process, we also have to convince ourself that we’re not who we really are.

    It sounds complicated but it’s really simple. Before we can believe that we’re someone we’re not, we have to convince ourselves that who we really are is not true.

    Why would we do such a thing? Because we’re afraid that if we don’t fit someone else’s expectations, we may find ourselves isolated or alone. And no one wants to be alone. Right?

    However, loneliness is most felt when you’re in company that doesn’t recognise who you really are. To connect sincerely and meaningfully with another, we must be true to ourselves first, or else we’ll lose every moment in our efforts to be what we took that need, rather than who we are.

    And that’s how we lose ourselves in the process.

    Read that again if you must, but internalise it.

    It could save your sanity and your peace.

  • A diet of fear

    A diet of fear

    This is probably one of the most important things you could ever connect with.

    So much damage is caused by fear driven decisions. It destroys your spirit leaving you to find comfort in the very source of the fear that is destroying you.

    If you’ve been raised on a diet of fear and compliance, it is inevitable that your choices will reflect your fears, and not your dreams

    Fear destroys hope and replaces it with futility.

    In the face of futility, we resort to compliance, because compliance provides us with familiarity.

    Familiarity tethers us to rituals, traditions, and behaviours that feed the cycle that sustains the power of fear.

    That is, the cycle of compliance at all costs.

    When compliance becomes the objective, blind following becomes the method, and critical thinking is set aside in favour of inclusion.

    The need for inclusion destroys dreams, breaks hearts, and damages souls, leaving in its wake a field of martyrs who surrender their joy in the face of futility, not realising that it is fear that breeds futility, and not overwhelming odds.

    Be courageous, brave soul. Self-imposed martyrdom is not the only path to peace. In fact, it defeats that very goal.

  • Know your worth

    Know your worth

    How many of us spend our lives trying to convince turkeys that they’re eagles, and in the process, sabotage our own growth and happiness?

    To quote another piece of old school wisdom, birds of a feather flock together.

    If you don’t know your own nature, you will associate with those who are not aligned with your goals or your passion in life.

    That’s the easiest way to embrace mediocrity while yearning for greatness.

    Of course, the downside to that is that if you’re surrounded by turkeys, and you claim your space, you may find yourself embracing loneliness and isolation.

    The conundrum of life.

    I pray that you are born into a home, a family, or at least a community that shares your passion and inspires your growth.

    Photo credit : Adobe Stock

  • Recognise your demons

    Recognise your demons

    Some of the most disheartening moments we may experience include trying to help someone we care about while they reject our efforts.

    The harder we try, the more they resist.

    The more persistent we are, the greater their anger or bitterness towards us.

    Most often, it’s not because of who we are or what we’re trying to do.

    Most often, it’s because we represent the source of the shame that they are grappling with.

    When someone feels inadequate, or like a failure, being around those who are composed, or appear successful feels like a threat to them because it risks highlighting their lack of achievement.

    Sometimes, just being a good person while standing next to a self-loathing person is enough to bring out the rage in them.

    Not because we tried to make them feel bad about their state, but because in our presence, their reasons for self-loathing were intensified.

    Despite our best intentions in that moment, if we don’t realise that we represent what they detest about themselves, we’ll blame ourselves for not being good enough, when in fact the opposite was true.

    As much as we may want to fight the demons of the ones we love, we must understand that some demons are a creation of their own minds, and can therefore only be fought themselves, or with those who don’t appear as a threat to revealing their shame.

    If you need assistance in supporting someone you love through such an episode in their lives, or if you are the one grappling with this, reach out via my website at zaidismail.com or on WhatsApp at +27836599183 and together we can create the life that you’ve always wanted.

    Photo credit : Adobe Stock


  • Celebrate your humanness

    Celebrate your humanness

    Tears are not weakness because it takes strength to embrace your humanness.

    The worst brutes lack the courage to be human because appearing unaffected by others is their idea of strength.

    Sadly, such a show of strength seals their hearts to emotion and blinds their eyes to the harshness that they exhale, creating distance between them and those they wish to have closer.

    They convince themselves that their cold exterior is needed to protect themselves from hurt while not realising that they created the self fulfilling prophecy that hurts them.

    When comparing yourself against such emotional detachment, it’s easy to believe that you’re weak for feeling something that leaves them untouched.

    No. The weakness is in them.

    Strength is found in knowing that your humanness doesn’t define your resilience.

    Being human makes makes resilience a beautiful trait.

    Without it, life loses its sweetness, and resilience becomes a cold comfort without fulfilment.

    Photo credit : Adobe Stock

  • The silent ones

    The silent ones

    True misery doesn’t love company.

    It decays the soul in silence.

    When someone is complaining, it’s because they still have hope that someone cares enough to listen or respond.

    Or even to empathise.

    When they give up on these three things, they go silent because they have grown to accept that no one else cares, or understands the state that they’re in.

    Too often we see their silence and assume it to be acceptance of their struggles or challenges, meanwhile it often symbolises the slow death of dreams, hopes, and ultimately, a life.

    Silence is the silent killer, more than rage.

    Listen with both ears and your heart.

    Pay attention to the silent ones.

    Your noise of ingratitude may just be drowning out their silence of pain.

    Find the balance between living loud and loving sincerely.

    The one without the other will smother people closest to you.

  • Seize the moment…not the day

    Seize the moment…not the day

    Tomorrow is not just another day.

    Tomorrow is simply today again, only with less time than we had yesterday.

    If you’re not focused on what you need to achieve today, you’ll always be trying to finish what you should’ve done yesterday.

    That’s how procrastination and misplaced optimism wastes away a good life.

    By all means, pace yourself so that you don’t burn out.

    But don’t become complacent in the process.

    Don’t wait for inspiration to strike.

    Inspiration most often hits you in the process of creating something amazing, not in the moments of over thinking what needs to be created.

    Show up.

    Get started.

    Seize the day.

    Tomorrow is never guaranteed.

    Procrastination doesn’t only steal time, it also steals your dreams.

    Embracing your passion in the absence of validation can be quite a powerful source of self-doubt.

    Believe in yourself, otherwise how can you expect others to believe in what you’re creating?