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You are your own worst victim
The victim mindset wreaks the most destruction and creates the worst of oppressors. The victim mindset is established when we find ourselves nursing wounds of experiences and betrayals that have long since passed. The victim mindset is nurtured when we are emotionally impacted by the behaviour of those who play no meaningful role in our…
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Who smiles first?
Are you perhaps the village idiot in someone else’s life, or maybe they’re filling that role in yours? The answer to the question as to who puts a smile on the face of the village idiot is that no one does. No one puts a smile on the face of the village idiot because no…
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Redirected rage
Our self-worth defines our behaviour in moments when we feel most unappreciated. Whether a toddler, a teen, or an adult, we are provoked towards anger and bad behaviour when we feel taken for granted or irrelevant to those who matter to us. It doesn’t mean that they must treat us badly. It could be as…
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You cannot make them rise
I’ve seen, and experienced first hand, the disaster that awaits when we convince ourselves that the demons that others deal with is our responsibility to resolve. Being kind, compassionate, and even understanding does not mean that we must own the decisions that others have made, especially when those decisions include them choosing to hold on…
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The past sucks eggs
Life sucks when we take our experiences with others from the past and project it onto the relationship that we have with someone in our present. Sadly, this applies to all relationships, not just marriage or romantic partnerships. It applies to the parent-child relationship as much as it applies to spouses. Especially in times when…
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You cannot not have expectations
The advice to live life without expectations to avoid disappointment is disturbingly misleading. If you’re striving to achieve this state of having no expectations of anyone, please stop. When we convince ourselves that we should not expect anything from others, we also have to convince ourselves that they should not expect anything from us. If…
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A peaceful fight
Insanity is subjective. So is truth. The less we remember this, the more likely it is that we will oppress. To pass judgement without understanding reflects our insanity. To restrain judgement until we reach understanding reflects our search for truth. These two positions define the efforts of our days and the contemplations of our nights.…
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The demon child of ingratitude
Disrespect only ever becomes an option when we disrespect ourselves. We don’t always disrespect ourselves because life is fluid, demanding different things from us at different times. In those moments when we are expected to be more than we believe we’re capable of, or when we are corrected for something that we do because we…
