Those who respect your victim-hood do so because it makes them feel better about themselves.
They either feel more accomplished, or they find comfort in the familiarity of your struggle.
Sometimes it gives them purpose in their need to uplift others so that their lives feel more fulfilled.
Whether their intentions are good or not is not what’s important. The important point is that neither prompts you to rise above being a victim.
Those who support you in your moments of weakness or need but also encourage you to rise above it are the ones to cherish.
Before you take offence to what I’m saying, you need to realise that you’re only a victim when you allow the oppression of others to define your self worth, and to dictate your effort towards establishing a life worth living.
The moment you own your life and rise above the impact of that oppression, you’re no longer a victim, you’re a fighter! Not a survivor!
As long as you focus on surviving, you’re still defined by the moment of your oppression, even though you may have freed yourself from it.
Be more than the struggles of your life. It’s possible, and beautifully rewarding.
Photo credit : Naadirah Ismail
#hope #expectation #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #mybeloved #zaidismail #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #narcissism #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticparents
Tag: expectation
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Do more than survive
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Fear breeds sadness
Fear creates more sadness than heartbreak ever will.
Fear keeps us anchored in a moment that has long since passed.
Fear convinces us that we need to be protected from what we previously experienced, while distracting us from the wisdom and strength that we gained from that experience.
Fear prompts us to look for signs and evidence that what we fear may once again be approaching, and distracts us from the signs and evidence that what we hope for is within reach.
Like everything that destroys, fear requires little effort because it is a self-sustaining cycle.
Hope, on the feet hand, requires courage.
Hope demands that we reconnect with who we are before that last bitter encounter.
Hope is not for the meek. When we succumb to fear, the meek prevail and life loses its sweetness.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #mybeloved #zaidismail #authenticity #lifecoaching #narcissisticpartner #narcissism #narcissisticabuse -
Fearfully hopeful
Patience is only patience when it is the foundation of hope. Not when it is the pacifier of fear.
Hope is the currency of growth, whereas fear is what breeds decay.
To patiently await the decay of what we hold dear is not patience, it is surrender.
To hope, despite the apparent futility that stares us down, is the ultimate rebellion against fear.
To patiently persevere is therefore to continue fighting for that which brings us love and happiness, especially when the circumstances of our lives will warrant a surrender.
It is this beautiful patience that holds the promise of a heart filled with love, or a life fraught with pain.
When we lose sight of the outcome that we hope to achieve, we surrender to fear and settle for the familiarity of the pain that we once yearned to escape.
Surrender must never be an option.
Fa sabrun jameel…
Photo credit: Adobe stock
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #mybeloved #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #lifecoaching #counselling -
Trading off the best of me
If kindness and compassion are a reflection of who we are, there can be no prerequisite for anyone to have to deserve it, or to earn it from us.
How we express it towards them may take different forms, including tough love.
But it is our intention behind that tough love, and how we follow through with it, that determines if it was indeed inspired by kindness and compassion, or by anger or frustration.
The moment we expect someone to earn our kindness, respect, or any other virtue that we claim to possess, we lose that virtue and replace it with arrogance.
Arrogance is a result of a low self esteem.
There is no reason to demand recognition of our contribution if we truly appreciate the value of what we contribute.
Therefore, we diminish ourselves by trading with others that which we should be valuing within ourselves.
Express the beauty of you despite the bitterness of those around you.
It may be the very catalyst needed to break the cycle of your life that you so despise.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #optimism #zaidismail #lifecoaching #narcissisticpartner #narcissism #narcissisticabuse -
Understanding misunderstanding
When we find that, despite our sincerest efforts, we continue to be misunderstood, consider that perhaps we need to focus on understanding instead.
Understanding becomes difficult when we’re gripped with the desperation of needing others to understand how important something is to us.
That desperation is often driven by fear, or self pity, rather than conviction. And it’s fed by a belief that they simply don’t realise how important it is.
If we’re not careful, this is how we become the architects of our own misery, or the result of our own self-fulfilling prophecy.
The greater our emotional investment, the more likely we are to contaminate that space with fear or self pity.
Creating space for understanding is the most important thing you can do to avoid a potential lifetime of regret.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #relationshipgoals #companionship #soulfood #soulmates #selfawareness #mybeloved #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #narcissisticpartner #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #zaidismail -
Ephemeral existence…
Life, more than anything else, is about perspective.
In moments of struggle, we’re inclined to look back on the many times that we were weighed down in life.
Sometimes we reminisce about the good times, but from a place of hopelessness believing that we may never experience it again.
At such times, it feels like life is long and dreary.
But when we connect with joys from the past, and hope to recreate even greater joys in future, the fleeting nature of life is impressed upon us.
Our need to focus on the bad experiences is an attempt at protecting our fragile hearts from having to face such heartache or disappointment again.
Focus on the joys, and suddenly we connect with our ability to smile in the face of trials, and to reconnect with joy even after the gravest disappointment.
Breathe, beloved…our default state is joy, if only we’ll embrace it more than we hold onto the fear. A joyful life is always still possible as long as there is breath left in our lungs.
#hope
#expectation
#ownyourlife
#relationshipgoals
#joy
#mentalhealth
#mentalhealthrecovery
#mentalhealthawareness
#mybeloved
#narcissisticabuse
#narcissisticparents
#narcissisticpartner -
Blessed are the few…
Blessed be the gentle ones who love too fiercely,
Accept too easily
And hope endlessly.
The ones torn between duty and love
Or responsibility and passion
The ones who sacrifice quietly
But celebrate others loudly
The ones who when sad
Find joy in making others smile
Who serve willingly
But expect none in return
Blessed be they,
For they are the whispers of the heavenly breeze
Amidst the howling dogs.
#poetry
#hope
#expectation
#life
#love
#mybeloved
#ownyourlife
#zaidismail
#authorsofinstagram -
The impossible dream
When home is elusive, the world feels ominous.
A journey to a place you’ve never been holds the promise of peace, despite never having known what peace feels like.
It’s a cry of the soul, in tones and words that no one seems to understand.
But you keep crying, and you keep trying, because something deep inside convinces you that there must be more than this.
If only it was possible to know why this never felt enough, it would be so much easier to figure out why home is still worth searching for.
The impossible dream that is too important to abandon, but too wholesome to feel worthy of it.
It truly is a long longing, for something we imagine would finally reach the deep, dark recesses of our being, and offer it the light it has been yearning since our first breath.
Will the yearning remain even after our last breath?
Or is hope for fools who dare to dream despite living a recurrent nightmare?
#hope #expectation #dreams #whatdreamsmaycome #home #peace #rest #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail #mybeloved #depression #suicide #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME
