There are two types of people in this world.
Those who appreciate our efforts for trying to achieve good things.
And those who ignore our efforts and judge us for failing.
The ones who appreciate the effort recognise their own path towards growth, and empathise with the struggle and aspirations of others. This inspires them to uplift and guide gently, although firmly at times.
The ones who judge others for failing are bitter about not having had such support when they failed on their path of growth, and therefore feel a need to highlight the shortcomings of others so that they may draw attention to their own successes, or their struggles.
This prompts them to be harsh and uncompromising in their feedback and expectations from others.
Being aware of which one of these you are can shift the dynamic of your life from one of toxic competition, to one of peaceful perseverance.
The choice you make will have a profound impact on the quality of your life, and your relationships with those around you.
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#bitterness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #zaidismail #personalpower #personaldevelopment #lifecoaching #leadershipcoach #leadershipdevelopment
Tag: leadershipcoach
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Understanding vs Judgement
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Fearfully hopeful
Patience is only patience when it is the foundation of hope. Not when it is the pacifier of fear.
Hope is the currency of growth, whereas fear is what breeds decay.
To patiently await the decay of what we hold dear is not patience, it is surrender.
To hope, despite the apparent futility that stares us down, is the ultimate rebellion against fear.
To patiently persevere is therefore to continue fighting for that which brings us love and happiness, especially when the circumstances of our lives will warrant a surrender.
It is this beautiful patience that holds the promise of a heart filled with love, or a life fraught with pain.
When we lose sight of the outcome that we hope to achieve, we surrender to fear and settle for the familiarity of the pain that we once yearned to escape.
Surrender must never be an option.
Fa sabrun jameel…
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#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #mybeloved #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #lifecoaching #counselling -
Last words don’t always matter
Last words are only needed when we still care about what others think.
Hoping to set the record straight about incorrect assumptions that someone may make of us is most often due to us still caring about their opinion of us.
Importantly though, their opinion will only matter if they still matter to us.
And they only matter to us if we still believe that they’re capable of being better than who they are, and we still want to influence them to be that better version of themselves.
This is one of the roots of expectation in our relationships…often relationships that are no longer serving us well.
And it’s this expectation or need to be influential in their lives that continues to hold us back when trying to move on from a relationship that isn’t working.
Your self-worth is not dependent on how you are able to influence others. However, it is a reflection of your worth to them.
Recognise this critical difference and choose dignity and self-respect before you choose to sacrifice yourself in the hope of inspiring their virtues.
Maintaining hope that they will one day realise what they need to about themselves, without expecting them to trust your input about their potential, is one of the most effective ways to break the hold of the expectations that keep you invested in a bad relationship.
Letting go of those expectations creates space within you to allow yourself to express to the world your virtues, rather than holding back while waiting for others to appreciate you first.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #lifecoaching #lifecoach -
Gratitude is not the first step
Gratitude is all that matters, because gratitude is not possible without everything that matters coming before it.
Gratitude escapes us when we don’t respect the effort needed to achieve anything worth achieving.
It escapes us when we assume that we’re entitled to an outcome, without considering our contribution that is needed towards that outcome.
It escapes us when we take for granted what we have, because we’re always focused on what we don’t have.
To appreciate the effort, the struggle, or the commitment needed to create anything of value, we need to first recognise the sacrifice, the hard work, the consistency, and the commitment needed to develop the skills to gather the resources needed to achieve it.
For this reason, we all have something that we give to others for which they should be grateful, but sadly, we cannot insert gratitude into their hearts for it.
We can only contribute the best of who we are, and appreciate why we may not always be appreciated.
We cannot give what we don’t have. The ungrateful one lacks gratitude for who they are and what they have.
Expecting gratitude from such a being is therefore foolhardy, no matter how significant they may be in your life.
#gratitude #appreciation #hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #optimism -
The understanding seeker
Seek to understand, so that you may be able to accept the events of your life with peace, rather than feeling compelled to let go with bitterness.
It’s the inclination to want to be heard that denies us peace when we’re not heard.
Or to want to be acknowledged when we are dismissed.
Rather than fight to be heard, or to be acknowledged, choose your battles.
Be sure that what you’re fighting for is what you want to have in your life, and not just because you refuse to go quietly.
When you find it impossible to get through, to make your point, or to establish reason, it’s a sign that you need to pause and understand better what it is that you’re dealing with.
When you pause to understand, you’ll allow yourself a chance to decide if the fight is worth it, and if it is, you’ll create space for yourself to recognise a better way to achieve your objective.
Like the prophetic advice teaches us, don’t get angry. The moment you find your anger rising, it’s a sign that you need to step back, and seek to understand better, before continuing to respond.
Peace.
#peace #conviction #understanding #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness -
The value of values
One of the paths to insanity is to try to reason around someone else’s actions or behaviour by assuming that their value system is the same as yours.
This includes people who come from the same culture, tradition, ethnicity, and even family as you do.
Our value system may be informed by a common framework or point of reference.
But, unless everyone complies 100% with that framework, each interpretation or implementation of those values becomes a unique value system, as unique as each individual.
When we don’t recognise these differences, we insist on compliance rather than understanding in the way each person adopts these values in their lives.
That’s the root of misunderstanding: The assumption that because we have shared values on some key issues, we have shared values on all issues.
Thus, relationships and homes are broken because of our expectations of compliance rather than our efforts towards understanding.
#values #counselling #culture #traditions #familytime #familyvalues #religion #relationshipgoals #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach
