Category: Life Coaching

  • Naturally you…only more beautiful

    Naturally you…only more beautiful

    Sometimes, we grow so fixated on our appearance that we forget that it’s that very fixation that causes blemishes.

    Our bodies are most at balance and ease when our emotional balance is optimal.

    There is no single definition of what optional means because we’re all unique in what we take from life, and what we aspire to create within it.

    The moment we focus on our aesthetics, we lose sight of what makes us unique, and risk losing ourselves to the validation of our appearance from others.

    This starts a vicious cycle of our physical form requiring more maintenance and nurturing than it would naturally need, convincing us that our focus on our physical state is reflective of how we care for our spiritual or emotional state.

    Simply stated, balance of beauty comes from within, whereas imbalance of spirit comes from without.

    OK, perhaps that wasn’t so simple, so here’s one more attempt to explain this simply.

    When you focus on your appearance, you will lose sight of your essence. Of the substance of who you are.

    Focus on your substance and your appearance will become a natural and beautifully balanced expression of who you are that will require no extended beauty regiments, and instead will leave you glowing without the need for synthetic products.

    It’s a while lit lies effort and much cheaper to maintain as well, with sustainable results.

    Struggling to find that balance? Reach out via my website at zaidismail.com or on WhatsApp at +27836599183, and let’s get you on track to creating the life that you’ve always dreamed of.

    Photo credit : Adobe Stock

  • Peace is not the absence of battles

    Peace is not the absence of battles

    When life feels overwhelming, the most effective way to slow things down is to choose our battles.

    Prioritising what’s important over what’s urgent usually sets the tone for what we tolerate or invest our time in, versus what we ignore or postpone.

    However, this only creates capacity to deal with new battles that may arise, it doesn’t create space for peace.

    Peace often remains elusive because we’re still responding to what comes our way rather than shaping what we want from life.

    More importantly, peace begins to feel like the absence of battles. It’s not.

    The absence of battles is just a breather. A break from the struggle. But as long as we know the struggle is waiting for us the moment we finished taking our breather, we won’t experience peace.

    Peace only becomes possible when we break the cycles that keeps inviting battles into our space.

    Breaking that cycle means knowing what we’re doing to feed that cycle of struggles that keep weighing us down.

    This demands emotional mindfulness, because it’s how we feel about what we’re facing that determines how we respond. As long as we focus only on the effectiveness of our response, we won’t be able to consciously choose to stop feeding the cycle that makes that response necessary.

    It’s not as complicated as it sounds. And peace is very achievable, despite having had a lifetime of pain or hardship.

    For more info, check out my website at zaidismail.com or reach out on WhatsApp at +27836599183 for affordable coaching that will bring the change that you so desperately want in your life.

    Photo credit : Adobe Stock

  • It’s not always about you

    It’s not always about you

    With due to respect to the author of this quote, I totally disagree with this view. This is why.

    It’s one thing to let someone know that you were hurt by something that they did or said. But it’s something totally different to blame them for hurting you.

    When you make them aware of how you feel about what they did, that’s owning your response and creating an opportunity for them to understand the impact that they have on you.

    When you insist that they hurt you, and deny them the right to say that they didn’t, you impose your belief on their intention behind what they did.

    Why is this important? Simple. The moment you blame someone else for your emotional response, you don’t own your response and instead, you give up your power to own your life. In other words, you become a victim of everyone else’s actions.

    Worse than this, you become the oppressor after feeling oppressed. Or the hurtful one after feeling hurt, because something completely innocent done by someone else becomes tainted with your trigger to that event. Or your bitterness about something that they are not responsible for.

    The same way that you want your emotions to be honoured by others, you need to honour their emotions as well. And you do this by trying to understand why they may do something that is hurtful to you without making it about you.

    Seek to understand. Like someone once told me, not all who claim to love, seek to understand. So just because you claim to love someone doesn’t give you the right to blame them for your hurt. That’s not love. That’s abuse. Abuse of the trust that they place in you.

    You can do better than that.

  • It’s not always about you

    It’s not always about you

    The truth is, if you want to matter that much to someone else, shouldn’t they matter equally as much to you?

    If they do, and you find that they don’t have as much time for you as they used to, or are behaving differently to what you know them to be about, do you claim your privilege to be treated better than that, or do you show sincere concern for what they may be dealing with?

    Busting mental health myths is essential to break the cycle that feeds toxic victim mindsets.

    The problem with this meme is that is encourages self-centered perspectives and denies the struggles that someone else may be going through.

    Sometimes the ones we love may be so overwhelmed by what they’re going through that withdrawal from the world is the only way that they believe they can cope.

    It’s not about how much you may want them to lean on you, or take comfort from you. Sometimes, their battle with themselves drives them to want to protect others from the impact that it is having on them.

    Don’t be so quick to write people off. When you do that, you lose the right to ask others to give you the benefit of the doubt when you’re going through a struggle that no one else understands.

    Sacrificing what you need in favour of understanding someone you love, is sometimes the greatest gift of love you could give anyone. Even if they don’t realise it at the time.

    It’s about what you want to gift to them, not what you need from them that matters.


  • To be heard

    To be heard

    When moderation is surrendered in protest against control or oppression, vulgarity seems like the only reasonable way to be heard.

    Rather than focus on the need to be heard, we should consider why our voice may have been lost to the noise around us.

    Adding to that noise further erodes rational thought and expression, creating a polarised environment rather than an inclusive and nurturing one.

    The more we give in to the need to be heard, the more we lose our voice, and our sense of self.

    That’s when vulgarity becomes acceptable to us.

    Because in the absence of moderation, vulgarity becomes the only effective expression.

    Unless, of course, we’re mindful enough to realise that making a point through vulgarity destroys more than it achieves.

    And what it achieves is rarely the good that we hoped to create.

    Reclaim your voice.

    Photo credit : Adobe Stock










  • Don’t label your struggle

    Don’t label your struggle

    Mental health is about hope. The more hope we have for experiencing joy tomorrow, the better our mental health today.

    The human experience is not an illness.

    The best way to protect your mental health is by recognising your humanness.

    Don’t allow your reality to be labelled as something more than your experience of the ups and downs in your life.

    When you find yourself with more bad days than good days, it’s because you need to do something differently. You need to break a cycle that is not serving you well.

    When you find hope is scarce, or difficult to hold onto, reconnect with your passion and your principles, and trust that it’s not hope that dies, but just our distracted state that makes it difficult for us to sometimes connect with that hope.

    Gently clear away the distractions that have grown to define your state, and reconnecting with hope will come naturally.

    Be kind to yourself first, and not just in physical self care. If you find that difficult to do, , reach out on WhatsApp at +27836599183 or via my website at zaidismail.com for affordable coaching rates.

    Remember, you can’t give what you don’t have. Together, let’s create the life that you’ve always wanted.

  • Never stop chasing

    Never stop chasing

    The thing about chasing dreams, is that it’s our dreams.

    As obvious as that seems, we rarely recognise that no one else will ever have a view of our dreams the way that we have it even if we describe it to them in detail.

    They will visualise it within the context of their lives and limitations.

    By chasing our dreams with conviction, we must connect with the value that will be created when we achieve those dreams.

    It’s that value that will give us the tenacity and resilience to push beyond the doubts and cynicism of those we encounter on our journey.

    To believe in that value, you must believe in yourself.

    Believing in yourself means to develop an informed opinion of who you are, despite what the world may think of you. Because, again, the opinions that others have of you is based on the context and limitations that they see in their lives, not in yours.

    Stop waiting for permission to chase your dreams. Like Barry Hilton said, “It’s your dream to lose.”




  • Who are you?

    Who are you?

    No matter what you do in life, you are always either a benefit or a burden to those around you.

    Your presence or contribution either uplifts them, or weighs them down.

    If you’re not aware of the impact that you have on others, you’ll unwittingly undermine the very goals that you hope to achieve in life.

    Self awareness is not just about being aware of the self, or accepting who we are. More importantly, it is about understanding why we have become who we are.

    Without that understanding, we can make the most sincere intentions and the bravest efforts in our desire to improve our life and the lives of those important to us, but if we’re unaware of the underlying influences that shape who we are, life often becomes a constant struggle rather than a journey of growth and fulfilment.

    Break the cycle of struggles and build the legacy that you want to leave for those around you. Reach out on WhatsApp at +27836599183 or via my website at zaidismail.com for affordable coaching rates and a customised approach that will change your life.