I realise that this is a highly contentious point. But we must recognise the elephant in the room before we are able to deal with it.
The myth that depression is an illness causes more harm than the good it’s intended to achieve.
Depression is the absence of hope. Preceding that is the saturation of failed expectations from those we consider significant in our lives.
Like happiness, depression is not a choice. But, also like happiness, depression is an outcome of the collective choices that we make.
The more aware we are of those choices, and importantly the consequences of those choices, the more consciously we are able to make decisions to break the cycles that result from those choices.
The moment we label a human experience as an illness or a disorder, we create victims rather than masters of our emotional experience, thereby disempowering us in our efforts to rise above the unpleasant experiences of our lives.
Depression is not an illness. It is a legitimate human experience in response to bad experiences in life.
When we begin to recognise this, it becomes possible to reconnect with our humanity, rather than to surrender to an imagined illness.
#depression #narcissism #narcissisticabuse #emotionalabuse #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #pursuitofhappiness #zaidismail
Tag: mentalhealth
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Depression is not an illness
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Do more than survive
Those who respect your victim-hood do so because it makes them feel better about themselves.
They either feel more accomplished, or they find comfort in the familiarity of your struggle.
Sometimes it gives them purpose in their need to uplift others so that their lives feel more fulfilled.
Whether their intentions are good or not is not what’s important. The important point is that neither prompts you to rise above being a victim.
Those who support you in your moments of weakness or need but also encourage you to rise above it are the ones to cherish.
Before you take offence to what I’m saying, you need to realise that you’re only a victim when you allow the oppression of others to define your self worth, and to dictate your effort towards establishing a life worth living.
The moment you own your life and rise above the impact of that oppression, you’re no longer a victim, you’re a fighter! Not a survivor!
As long as you focus on surviving, you’re still defined by the moment of your oppression, even though you may have freed yourself from it.
Be more than the struggles of your life. It’s possible, and beautifully rewarding.
Photo credit : Naadirah Ismail
#hope #expectation #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #mybeloved #zaidismail #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #narcissism #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticparents -
Don’t sell yourself short
When you surrender your principles in exchange for affection, you give others permission to demand compromises rather than create understanding.
Worse than this, when you make such a compromise, you undermine your worth in the relationship by giving up what you believe in, not because you changed your beliefs, but because you wanted to be accepted.
Instead of upholding your truth, you settle for inclusion by those who don’t subscribe to your truth.
After some time, when the price of that inclusion begins to take its toll, you’ll find yourself adrift without your principles to anchor you, and with the realisation that they never really accepted you in the first place.
How could they if you didn’t reveal to them the truth of who you were?
That’s when life feels empty or burdensome, and anger becomes the tool through which we demand our significance in those relationships because we were hoping that at some point they would see our sacrifice and appreciate us for it, only to discover that our sacrifice was never important to begin with.
That anger is not always directed at those who didn’t appreciate us. Often, it’s directed at ourselves for not being good enough.
Think carefully before you compromise who you are just so that you can fit in. Every compromise comes at a cost. Be sure that you’re willing to pay the cost before you lose yourself in the process.
#selfworth #selfawareness #ownyourlife #selfmastery #mindfulness #personalpower #ownyourshit #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #lifecoaching #relationshipgoals #companionship #soulfood #soulmates -
More than mindfulness
What we respond to reflects our personal values.
How we respond reflects our ego.
Emotional mindfulness is key to getting this right.
Situational mindfulness is knowing which battles to choose. That’s our value system that drives our choices.
Emotional mindfulness is being aware of how we feel when we choose our battles. That’s our self worth that comes into play.
Recognising the difference allows us to be more effective at achieving the positive outcomes that we hope for in life, rather than self-sabotaging because of our insecurities that may contaminate our tone in communicating what we feel strongly about.
Take your mindfulness to the next level.
More info on zaidismail.com.
#ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail #narcissism -
Poetry of old
“Poetry often belies the age of the poet,
but always reveals the struggles of the soul.
What we write of youth, applies to old.
But most would rather resist it,
Than bear the truth be told.
I’m in love with life.
But I hate the world.”
It’s possible to live life romantically, you know. Despite the horrors and pain that appear to be so pervasive in this world, perhaps romance is the ultimate rebellion against the cruelty of life.
Perhaps.
This is something that I wrote a few years ago, it still accurately describes my conflicted relationship with this world.
What you take from this, be it pessimistic, optimistic, or simply cynical, is a reflection of who you are and what your current relationship is with your world.
Yet, most will read into this what they believe to be true about me, not realising that what we see in others is a reflection of what we are hopeful, grateful, or bitter about in that moment.
How connected are you with your relationship with the world around you?
#poetry #romance #womansmonth #life #love #mybeloved #relationshipgoals #companionship #soulfood #soulmates #anincompletelovestory #zaidismail #lovestory #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery -
Fear breeds sadness
Fear creates more sadness than heartbreak ever will.
Fear keeps us anchored in a moment that has long since passed.
Fear convinces us that we need to be protected from what we previously experienced, while distracting us from the wisdom and strength that we gained from that experience.
Fear prompts us to look for signs and evidence that what we fear may once again be approaching, and distracts us from the signs and evidence that what we hope for is within reach.
Like everything that destroys, fear requires little effort because it is a self-sustaining cycle.
Hope, on the feet hand, requires courage.
Hope demands that we reconnect with who we are before that last bitter encounter.
Hope is not for the meek. When we succumb to fear, the meek prevail and life loses its sweetness.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #mybeloved #zaidismail #authenticity #lifecoaching #narcissisticpartner #narcissism #narcissisticabuse -
Fearfully hopeful
Patience is only patience when it is the foundation of hope. Not when it is the pacifier of fear.
Hope is the currency of growth, whereas fear is what breeds decay.
To patiently await the decay of what we hold dear is not patience, it is surrender.
To hope, despite the apparent futility that stares us down, is the ultimate rebellion against fear.
To patiently persevere is therefore to continue fighting for that which brings us love and happiness, especially when the circumstances of our lives will warrant a surrender.
It is this beautiful patience that holds the promise of a heart filled with love, or a life fraught with pain.
When we lose sight of the outcome that we hope to achieve, we surrender to fear and settle for the familiarity of the pain that we once yearned to escape.
Surrender must never be an option.
Fa sabrun jameel…
Photo credit: Adobe stock
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #mybeloved #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #lifecoaching #counselling -
Trading off the best of me
If kindness and compassion are a reflection of who we are, there can be no prerequisite for anyone to have to deserve it, or to earn it from us.
How we express it towards them may take different forms, including tough love.
But it is our intention behind that tough love, and how we follow through with it, that determines if it was indeed inspired by kindness and compassion, or by anger or frustration.
The moment we expect someone to earn our kindness, respect, or any other virtue that we claim to possess, we lose that virtue and replace it with arrogance.
Arrogance is a result of a low self esteem.
There is no reason to demand recognition of our contribution if we truly appreciate the value of what we contribute.
Therefore, we diminish ourselves by trading with others that which we should be valuing within ourselves.
Express the beauty of you despite the bitterness of those around you.
It may be the very catalyst needed to break the cycle of your life that you so despise.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #optimism #zaidismail #lifecoaching #narcissisticpartner #narcissism #narcissisticabuse
