Tag: self worth

  • Psssst, guess what?

    Psssst, guess what?

    The universe is not waiting to serve you. It’s time to own your shit.

    “Expecting life to treat you well because you’re a good person is like expecting a bull not to charge at you because you’re a vegetarian.” (Unknown)

    This is my favourite quote whenever I come across someone that feels defeated because they were expecting the good that they do to be returned to them by ‘the universe’. I think it’s exceptionally arrogant to believe that the universe is actively conspiring to treat us well, or treat us badly, because of what we send forth. No. There are manipulators and con artists that get good to come their way all the time despite using everyone else as pawns in their game of life. And then when one bad thing happens to them, people are quick to jump on that karma bandwagon. So, let me get this straight…a lifetime of unethical and underhanded behaviour is repaid by a single event of loss or tragedy, and that’s supposed to be karma? No. It’s life. We are only ever good at what we set our minds to. If there was true justice in this world, we wouldn’t have the kind of problems that we’re facing as humanity. Let’s keep it real. Shall we?

    #thesecret #whatgoesaroundcomesaround

  • The Beauty of Defeat – PechaKucha Style

    The Beauty of Defeat – PechaKucha Style

    A PechaKucha style presentation format that I presented in front of a live audience at a bookstore in Johannesburg, South Africa. I discuss the beauty of defeat, and why moments that appear to deflate us should be embraced, rather than blocked out.
  • The absence of gratitude

    The absence of gratitude

    It’s easier to assume that someone is ungrateful rather than to invest time in discovering what it is that distracts them. If we work with the assumption (if not the truth) that one is in search of the same joy and peace that we are, seeking to understand each other will be easier than wanting to judge each other.

    The absence of gratitude is not always ingratitude. Often it’s a distraction. Like looking at the dark clouds instead of appreciating the rain. The distractions are what take us off our desired path in life when we place significance on things that are out of our control, or not as consequential as we believe it is. That’s when we find ourselves persisting in righting seeming wrongs, or defending imaginary attacks. The most effective strategy, I’ve found, to combat this is to seek understanding rather than assuming judgement. The more we understand, the less we judge. This does not mean that we condone or justify, it simply means that we seek to understand so that we may be able to accept with peace, rather than surrender with bitterness or regret.

  • It’s time to rethink mental health

    It’s time to rethink mental health

    The human experience is not an illness. Protect your mental health. Don’t allow your reality to be labelled as something other than what it is. It is your experience of the ups and downs in your life. When you find yourself with more bad days than good days, it’s because you need to do something differently. Mental health is about hope. The more hope we have for experiencing joy tomorrow, the better our mental health today. When you find hope is scarce, or difficult to hold onto, reconnect with your passion and your principles, and trust that it’s not hope that dies, but just our distracted state that makes it difficult for us to sometimes find. Gently clear away the distractions, and reconnecting with hope will come naturally.

  • Believing in yourself

    Believing in yourself

    Confidence comes from caring less about what others think of you, and caring more about what you think of yourself.

    The question is, do you know yourself well enough to have an informed opinion of yourself?

    When we rely on others for more than just feedback and instead allow them to validate who we are, we essentially give them the power to define how we feel about ourselves.

    Listening to what others think of you must be done with one single focus in mind. It must be with the objective of determining whether or not the message that you intended was in fact the message that they received.

    But, that means that you must know what your message is.

    What is your unique contribution?

    Self awareness shifts your focus from being aware of how others see you, to being aware of how you want to be seen.

    Once you improve your awareness of the way you want others to see you, within the context of your unique contribution, you’ll begin to accept input from others as feedback on that path that you’ve chosen for yourself, instead of using their input to define your path in the first place.

    It’s a subtle but critical difference, and the difference could be sanity and peace, versus going crazy looking for validation from people who themselves have yet to accept who they are.

    Choose wisely.

  • Live, Laugh, Love, and leave a Legacy

    Live, Laugh, Love, and leave a Legacy

    Live to love, to laugh, and to leave a legacy. Your material success will only be celebrated after your death if it is of benefit to others. Accumulation of wealth to stroke your ego not only deprives you of the joy of human connection, it also denies you the bonds of beauty that feeds your soul. Laughter should not be sourced from a business deal that outwitted your opponent. Such laughter will mock you in your later years when you realise that your fascination with wealth was merely a drop in the ocean of joy compared to what joy you could have achieved in investing the incredible talents you have to brighten up the faces of loved ones, or even strangers. Wealth is a means to an end. Don’t get so caught up in the means that you completely lose sight of your end.

  • Watch “UNISA Radio Interview (Aug ’19)” on YouTube

    Watch “UNISA Radio Interview (Aug ’19)” on YouTube

    Listen in for a discussion on why my latest book is so important in changing the narrative of the mental health issues that are spiralling out of control. It’s only once we gain a fresh perspective on old challenges that we can hope to find new ways of resolving them.

  • Serve a greater purpose

    Serve a greater purpose

    Life always has more purpose when you’re serving others.

    We’re built to serve others. When we lose hope in being served by others, we withhold our service in protest until we convince ourselves that no one will take care of us so we must take care of ourselves. That’s when life becomes hollow because it pulls us away from our core need: To be of significance to others. If you find yourself in this space, consider changing who you surround yourself with, otherwise you feed the very cycle that robs you of peace.