Peace always starts with you

The next time you find yourself having a disagreement with someone, consider if the way in which you conduct yourself is to demand that they show you due respect or consideration, or are you trying to establish understanding.

When we feel taken for granted or invisible in something that is important to us, we’re more likely to become defensive, aggressive, or passive aggressive in our efforts to get our point across.

If we’re not aware of our need for significance, we will go in search of significance in almost every setting.

This is how we end up yelling at cashiers, losing ourselves to road rage, and being argumentative with co-workers, as just a few examples.

Understanding why we feel insignificant is the first step towards breaking that cycle.

Understanding why those who are significant to us are not treating us with the significance that we need is the second step.

And the third step towards breaking this cycle of rage or bitterness at the world is to understand why we need such validation to feel significant before treating others in a way that is true to who we are, rather than being driven by the anger or disappointment that we feel.

Emotional mindfulness is core to the above, and having a healthy self-worth is what makes it possible to pace ourselves in our efforts towards creating the understanding and establishing the bonds that we believe will improve the quality of our relationships.

It always starts with you.

If you need help to understand what drives you to be less than who you want to be, reach out via my website at zaidismail.com or on WhatsApp at +27836599183, and let’s get the conversation started.

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