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A burdensome labour of love

Responsibility, when met with gratitude, feels like a labour of love.

Remove gratitude, and it becomes a burdensome load.

But only if gratitude is expected.

That’s when expectations weigh down on us more than responsibility, because of the internal wait for others to reciprocate, or to notice.

It’s not unreasonable to hold that expectation.

In fact, we should expect those around us to show gratitude or to share the load, so that the relationship is not reduced to one of a mere exchange of duties.

However, we must remember that they have the same expectation in return.

More than this, if we’re not aware of this expectation that we have, because it’s usually a subconscious one, we feel disappointment or a growing bitterness towards those who we feel are taking us for granted.

And again, the same is true in return from their side.

To overcome this, not only must we be aware of this expectation, we must also understand if the other person is aware of it, and if they’re capable of meeting it.

That opens a whole new can of worms. But that’s part of the fun of relationships, isn’t it?

Having silly moments of realisation when you discover that what you were fretting about was only real in your head because the support or gratitude you were looking for was there all along.

It just wasn’t in the form or expression that you were expecting.

#relationshipgoals #marriageadvice #marriage #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #lifecoaching #zaidismail #loveyourself #lifegoals #motivation #optimism #purpose #companionship #mentalhealthrecovery

Zaid Ismail

Author, life coach, and mental health activist. We need to change the narrative from disorders, illnesses, and survival to accountability, understanding, and thriving.

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