Look back with understanding

When you don’t have a gentle hand to guide you, or an understanding structure to support you, life will be shaped through trial and error.

In the same way that we can’t give what we don’t have, nor can others offer us what they don’t have – no matter how much we need it from them, or may have rights to get it from them.

Realising this has been the saving grace of my sanity through a colourful life.

So many of us set out in life knowing who we don’t want to be based on our experiences with those around us – especially our parents.

But we fail to realise that it doesn’t prepare us, or give us anything to work with, in determining how to be who we want to be.

It may sound cryptic, but it’s not.

It’s easy to identify what we want to achieve in life, but if we don’t know how life works, we will keep tripping up on the subtleties that cause havoc in ways that we never anticipated.

No one sets out to destroy their own life, even if they persist in blatantly destructive behaviour.

They do so because they exhausted themselves living life wishfully instead of purposefully.

Such a mindset results from anger about what you don’t have, leading to acting with haste or impatience in striving for what you want.

The only antidote that I’ve discovered for this is to observe, with the intention of understanding, those who let you down or didn’t show up the way you needed them to.

Our trial and error, like theirs, denies others the wisdom and support that they need to learn how life works.

Self-pity or entitlement, and especially anger, will never change that reality, it will only repeat the cycles that may have caused us hardship.

It always starts with you.

#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #lifecoaching #zaidismail #theegosystem #ownyourlife #parenting #divorce