Expect to expect more

There’s a fallacy out there that it’s possible to live without expectation.

Yeah, it’s a fallacy, cos it’s impossible.

When you try to live without expectation, you’re defending yourself against being hurt.

When you defend yourself preemptively, it means that you believe that you’re weak enough not to be able to deal with disappointment.

More than this, it means that you’re judging others because of their human failings, and you’re convinced that you’re incapable of failing others.

Just because you may not be aware of it doesn’t mean that you haven’t hurt or betrayed someone by not living up to their expectations.

We all do it.

When we judge others for being human, we lose the right to ask for understanding or empathy when we fall short because of our humanness.

Rather than not expecting, we should focus on whether our expectations were based on what we thought we deserved, or what the other person was capable of.

Before you look at capability from the perspective of what they’re physically capable of, remind yourself that your expectations are based on your emotional needs, not your physical needs.

So when you consider what someone is emotionally capable of rather than what they are physically capable of, you’ll find understanding about why them letting you down is not because of who you are, it’s because of what they’re struggling with within themselves.

You can’t wish that away.

You can either create space for them to grow, or exit their space because what you represent is what they’re grappling with.

When you believe someone is capable of something but they don’t believe it themselves, change your expectations to hope that they will see what you see, rather than writing them off because they disappointed or betrayed you.

It always starts with you.

#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #lifecoaching #zaidismail #theegosystem #ownyourlife