Surviving sucks

I see too many people take pride in being a survivor, which in itself is not the biggest problem.

The problem arises when that act of survival defines you for the rest of your life.

When a traumatic event, or an abusive relationship, defines you beyond the immediate impact of experiencing it, you keep it relevant long after its occurrence.

We surrender our lives to the efforts of survival when we lose sight of our ability to change our circumstances as we wait for change to arrive.

What’s worse is that we don’t realise that those who are not showing up for us are likely in survival mode themselves.

That’s how we do to others what has been done to us without realising that we’re part of that cycle.

While we’re ‘surviving’ or waiting, those who have rights over us to show up for them as fully formed humans are denied the experience of feeling significant because we treat them as duty.

But, more important than this, it’s not their ignored rights that is the greatest oppression.

Taking for granted our ability to create ease and joy despite our backdrop of struggles is the worst oppression against ourselves.

That’s the greatest loss of all.

Nothing compares to the loss of opportunity to contribute towards the sweetness of life for yourself and for others.

Not even death compares, because in death there is no life waiting to be lived.

In death there is no need to create joy or to experience the wonderment of life.

Yet so many yearn for death because of a tormenting moment from the past, while discarding their ability to create joy because of the horrors caused by troubled souls.

That’s how we become equally troubled and repeat their mistakes in our own unique way while lamenting the burden of existence, forgetting that we gave up on life itself.

Regret and sorrow has its place only as long as it spurs us into action, otherwise it ceases to be about what happened to us and becomes an indulgence of self-pity because we need our struggle to be appreciated.

#selfworth #selfawareness #selflove #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #lifecoaching #zaidismail