One of the biggest mistakes in trying to break the generational trauma cycle is that we focus on NOT wanting to be like our parents.
All that allows us to do is figure out what we don’t want for ourselves and our children.
While that might seem like enough, it also means that we will only become aware of our own unhealthy traits that we’re passing onto our children through trial and error.
Remember that knowing what you don’t want doesn’t mean that you know what is good or healthy. It means that you only know what of the unhealthy stuff you don’t want, but it doesn’t mean that you know what other unhealthy stuff awaits you.
Trial and error is a very painful and exhausting way to figure out how to build healthy relationships with our children, or with our parents, and by extension, with our partners.
By focusing on what we don’t want in life, we go through life in defence mode because we’re constantly protecting ourselves from the threats that may lead to a repeat of our experiences in our childhood or past relationships.
Thus, we risk replacing one cycle of generational trauma with another.
Seeking to understand why our parents may not have been capable of more than what we got from them is key to breaking the cycle.
But, we don’t know what we don’t know. That’s why fresh perspectives are needed in our efforts to unravel these difficult experiences of life.
This will be one of the key discussion points at the next event on Gender Wars on 29 October 2022.
If you haven’t booked your ticket yet, do so now at zaidismail.com.
Zoom tickets also available.
#events #genderwars #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #lifecoaching #zaidismail #parenting #generationaltrauma #marriageadvice
#divorce
Recycling generational trauma
