You judge others as you judge yourself

Judgement is easy.

Understanding, empathy, compassion…not so easy.

It only gets easier when we are capable of treating ourselves with kindness.

But that isn’t as easy as it sounds.

In fact, many of our efforts at kindness are harmful because we’re distracted from recognising what prompts our deliberate acts of kindness. Towards ourselves, and towards others.

The moment anything is done deliberately and isn’t a natural consequence of our value system instinctively driving our behaviour, the risk of it being self-serving is very high.

It’s like doing the right thing because it’s expected of you, rather than because you believe it’s the right thing to do.

The moment no one expects you to do it, you have no reason to continue doing it.

The same with empathy, compassion, and understanding.

If we do it because we would want someone to do it for us if we were in their position, then it’s self-serving.

When we have no reason to expect anyone to treat us in such gentle ways, we’ll easily stop treating others well as part of our protest against the world that is seemingly treating us badly.

That’s when judgement becomes easy.

The more aggressive or blatant we are about how we judge others, the more desperately it reflects our need for our struggle to be appreciated by others.

You are responsible for your self-worth.

The moment it is dependent on how others treat you, it’s not self-worth.

You cannot give what you don’t have.

That’s why you can only give what you have.

Your unwarranted judgement of others reveals how harshly you judge yourself.

Own it. And you may just be able to own your life.

#selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #lifecoaching #zaidismail #theegosystem #ownyourlife #compassion #kindness #mindfulness