Are you betraying yourself?

Betrayal stings.

It doesn’t always take the form of an explicit breach of trust.

Most often, I believe, betrayal is felt when we put in the effort to make significant others aware of what is important to us, only to watch them repeatedly take it for granted, or treat it with disregard.

Betrayal is what we feel when who we are is rendered insignificant in the face of what others need from us.

It’s felt when we’re always expected to show up, but rarely have them show up for us.

Betrayal, more than anything else, is felt when we realise that we’ve invested in others more than they ever had any intention of investing in us. If at all.

And in that moment of betrayal, it’s easy to focus on the reality of how little we mean to them, or how unimportant our dreams and aspirations are to them.

But that’s the distraction that keeps us weighed down by the betrayal.

The sooner we look beyond that, the sooner we’ll realise when we lost ourselves to what we thought was a relationship worth investing in.

Self-pity becomes an endearing companion at that point, as we lick our wounds and focus on everything that’s wrong with the world.

Entertain that self-pity for long enough, and you’ll become defined by how others treat you, while losing sight of how much worse you’re treating yourself.

Illness sets in when the self-pity progresses to self-loathing.

The only thing that breaks that cycle is the realisation that you were capable of investing because you had something of value to invest. And they didn’t.

Wishing that they were different, or that you were reason enough for them to be more than that is simply an indulgence in self-pity and an avoidance of reality.

Gratitude dictates that you reconnect with the value of who you are despite the betrayals from those whom you trusted.

That’s how we reconnect with the joy of life within ourselves, when those who live with ingratitude only take from us without sharing much in return.

It always starts with you.

#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #lifecoaching #zaidismail #theegosystem #ownyourlife

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