Honour yourself

Self-respect is more about who you want to be, rather than what you are willing to tolerate.

Claiming your space while diminishing the contribution of others in your life is not self-respect, it’s unintended ingratitude.

Self-respect is reflected in how you hold yourself accountable for the impact of your actions on others, and not just for your intentions towards them.

It’s about showing up beyond words or explanations, and ensuring that your actions reflect your intentions, especially when the feedback you receive confirms that how you treated others is not what you had intended.

But none of this is possible if you don’t have your own internal compass by which you hold yourself accountable.

That compass is the values that you claim to stand for.

When you lack that internal compass, you will be driven by how you feel in the presence of others.

When our feelings dictate our reasons, we hold others accountable for what we took from them, or from life, without stopping to consider that maybe we were wrong.

Maybe we understood things poorly, or interpreted things incorrectly.

When feelings drive rationality, our struggle becomes our war cry and everyone around us becomes responsible for honouring how we feel regardless of the merits of our reasons for why we feel that way.

That’s when we become oppressors while feeling oppressed.

Self-respect is born when we choose who we want to be regardless of what bad behaviour others may deserve because of how we think they treated us.

In that choice lies peace and the promise of contentment.

Anything less will leave you a slave to society, or an oppressor towards those who fear your outbursts.

Who do you want to be?

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