If kindness and compassion are a reflection of who we are, there can be no prerequisite for anyone to have to deserve it, or to earn it from us.
How we express it towards them may take different forms, including tough love.
But it is our intention behind that tough love, and how we follow through with it, that determines if it was indeed inspired by kindness and compassion, or by anger or frustration.
The moment we expect someone to earn our kindness, respect, or any other virtue that we claim to possess, we lose that virtue and replace it with arrogance.
Arrogance is a result of a low self esteem.
There is no reason to demand recognition of our contribution if we truly appreciate the value of what we contribute.
Therefore, we diminish ourselves by trading with others that which we should be valuing within ourselves.
Express the beauty of you despite the bitterness of those around you.
It may be the very catalyst needed to break the cycle of your life that you so despise.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #optimism #zaidismail #lifecoaching #narcissisticpartner #narcissism #narcissisticabuse
Tag: embracingME
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Trading off the best of me
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It’s not always betrayal
Betrayal is not always a result of harsh words, lies, or cruel action.
I’ve found that the deepest cuts were always from the silence when words were needed, the restrained sincerity when an embrace was called for, or inaction from those when I looked expectantly towards them while recalling the times they drew on my energy in the moments when I barely had enough to sustain my own spirit.
And I often wonder how many may look at me and feel the same way.
We’re often so focused on what we’re not getting from others, that we don’t pause to consider what they may not be getting from us either.
#mindfulness #inspiration #introspection #reflection #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #zaidismail -
The impossible dream
When home is elusive, the world feels ominous.
A journey to a place you’ve never been holds the promise of peace, despite never having known what peace feels like.
It’s a cry of the soul, in tones and words that no one seems to understand.
But you keep crying, and you keep trying, because something deep inside convinces you that there must be more than this.
If only it was possible to know why this never felt enough, it would be so much easier to figure out why home is still worth searching for.
The impossible dream that is too important to abandon, but too wholesome to feel worthy of it.
It truly is a long longing, for something we imagine would finally reach the deep, dark recesses of our being, and offer it the light it has been yearning since our first breath.
Will the yearning remain even after our last breath?
Or is hope for fools who dare to dream despite living a recurrent nightmare?
#hope #expectation #dreams #whatdreamsmaycome #home #peace #rest #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail #mybeloved #depression #suicide #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME -
Cherished to death
When love is a well kept secret, it becomes torturous
When love is embraced, it emits a glow that keeps the darkness of the world at bay
When we withhold our love from fear of it not being enough, we destroy the very object of our affection
Thus, self deprecation cherishes beauty in silence, but leaves to whither and die, the object of its cherishing
It is the doubts we harbour of our adequacy, that undermines our resolve to be beautiful
In our efforts to hide from the world our fear, we lose sight of those who see in us what we don’t see in ourselves
Those same souls who worship our beauty, but are discarded through our fear, are the souls whose hearts we cherish…silently
Our belief that they do not need our embrace as much as we wish they would embrace us, is what leaves them cherished, but discarded
Even the most cherished of hearts, if left without a home, will die of exposure.
Perhaps this is why the good fades from our lives, as we hold on to the bad that we believe is not fair to place as a burden on others…
#hope #expectation #sincerity #love #romance #companionship #soulfood #soulmates #anincompletelovestory #zaidismail #mybeloved #ownyourlife #embracingME #relationshipgoals #dreams #whatdreamsmaycome -
Willingly obliged
This is most true for religious subscription and cultural heritage, but applies to every relationship in our life.
Choice inspires willingness because a choice is driven by our belief in the benefit of our contribution towards others.
Obligation inspires contempt because it is most often associated with the threat of a negative repercussion.
What drives our choices and our sense of obligation therefore must be considered when we find ourselves growing angry at the thought of non-compliance from others, or the expectation of compliance from ourselves by others.
It is quite possible to choose consciously to serve an obligation. But that choice must be done willingly and not under duress. Duress turns a choice into an unwilling obligation.
Fear has a limited life span. Therefore, the moment we establish compliance with a lifestyle or behaviour through fear, we must prepare ourselves for the inevitable backlash.
Live consciously. Love deliberately. And serve without obligation.
Perhaps, beloved, in that lies the secret to experiencing peace in this lifetime.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #optimism #zaidismail #peace #mybeloved #obligation #culture #tradition #religion #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME -
Forever hopeful
Hope is born in moments when you have no reason to believe in the moment that is to follow, but something good unexpectedly lands in your lap.
It’s born when that unexpected call changes your life for the better.
It’s born when that stranger smiled an understanding smile in that moment that you thought the world was oblivious to your presence.
It’s born when you wake in the morning and discover that despite your worst premonitions, you have a good day.
Hope can be torturous when the events of your life have given you little reason to believe that the good that you experience will last for more than a fleeting moment.
But, knowing that it’s possible for it to last beyond that brief period of joy is what makes it impossible to ignore the hope that bubbles beneath the surface.
Hope is faith. And faith is hope.
Both are intricately woven into the fabric of our struggles.
When we focus on our struggles only, we lose sight of all those moments that planted the seeds of hope in our hearts so many lifetimes before the present moment.
In forgetting, we burden ourselves with more than the burdens of life. We burden ourselves with the burden of ingratitude as well.
Focus on hope, and faith will have your back.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #optimism #perseverance #motivation #goals #ambition #success #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery -
Last words don’t always matter
Last words are only needed when we still care about what others think.
Hoping to set the record straight about incorrect assumptions that someone may make of us is most often due to us still caring about their opinion of us.
Importantly though, their opinion will only matter if they still matter to us.
And they only matter to us if we still believe that they’re capable of being better than who they are, and we still want to influence them to be that better version of themselves.
This is one of the roots of expectation in our relationships…often relationships that are no longer serving us well.
And it’s this expectation or need to be influential in their lives that continues to hold us back when trying to move on from a relationship that isn’t working.
Your self-worth is not dependent on how you are able to influence others. However, it is a reflection of your worth to them.
Recognise this critical difference and choose dignity and self-respect before you choose to sacrifice yourself in the hope of inspiring their virtues.
Maintaining hope that they will one day realise what they need to about themselves, without expecting them to trust your input about their potential, is one of the most effective ways to break the hold of the expectations that keep you invested in a bad relationship.
Letting go of those expectations creates space within you to allow yourself to express to the world your virtues, rather than holding back while waiting for others to appreciate you first.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #lifecoaching #lifecoach -
Every breath is hope
When we undermine ourselves, we empower our enemies, and like they say, the friend of my enemy is my enemy.
So it stands to reason that that is how we become our own worst enemies.
It’s our efforts to subdue our hope in tomorrow, that offers us protection against yet more disappointment or heartache.
It’s also that same effort that pushes away the very blessings that we need to let go of the pain of a life in which we were never enough.
The only reason we need to protect ourselves from that disappointment is because we still judge ourselves against the backdrop of a tainted life, and a tortured love.
Every breath we take is a confirmation that we’re still filled with hope. Every breath is hope.
So breathe a little deeper than before. Because it was that tainted life that stifled your breath, suffocating your hope, and distorting your vision of what the future holds.
Breathe a little deeper, beloved. And allow that promise of hope to carry you forward in life, not to return you to what you’ve left behind.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #optimism
