Those who respect your victim-hood do so because it makes them feel better about themselves.
They either feel more accomplished, or they find comfort in the familiarity of your struggle.
Sometimes it gives them purpose in their need to uplift others so that their lives feel more fulfilled.
Whether their intentions are good or not is not what’s important. The important point is that neither prompts you to rise above being a victim.
Those who support you in your moments of weakness or need but also encourage you to rise above it are the ones to cherish.
Before you take offence to what I’m saying, you need to realise that you’re only a victim when you allow the oppression of others to define your self worth, and to dictate your effort towards establishing a life worth living.
The moment you own your life and rise above the impact of that oppression, you’re no longer a victim, you’re a fighter! Not a survivor!
As long as you focus on surviving, you’re still defined by the moment of your oppression, even though you may have freed yourself from it.
Be more than the struggles of your life. It’s possible, and beautifully rewarding.
Photo credit : Naadirah Ismail
#hope #expectation #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #mybeloved #zaidismail #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #narcissism #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticparents
Tag: theegosystem
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Do more than survive
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More than mindfulness
What we respond to reflects our personal values.
How we respond reflects our ego.
Emotional mindfulness is key to getting this right.
Situational mindfulness is knowing which battles to choose. That’s our value system that drives our choices.
Emotional mindfulness is being aware of how we feel when we choose our battles. That’s our self worth that comes into play.
Recognising the difference allows us to be more effective at achieving the positive outcomes that we hope for in life, rather than self-sabotaging because of our insecurities that may contaminate our tone in communicating what we feel strongly about.
Take your mindfulness to the next level.
More info on zaidismail.com.
#ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail #narcissism -
Fear breeds sadness
Fear creates more sadness than heartbreak ever will.
Fear keeps us anchored in a moment that has long since passed.
Fear convinces us that we need to be protected from what we previously experienced, while distracting us from the wisdom and strength that we gained from that experience.
Fear prompts us to look for signs and evidence that what we fear may once again be approaching, and distracts us from the signs and evidence that what we hope for is within reach.
Like everything that destroys, fear requires little effort because it is a self-sustaining cycle.
Hope, on the feet hand, requires courage.
Hope demands that we reconnect with who we are before that last bitter encounter.
Hope is not for the meek. When we succumb to fear, the meek prevail and life loses its sweetness.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #mybeloved #zaidismail #authenticity #lifecoaching #narcissisticpartner #narcissism #narcissisticabuse -
Fearfully hopeful
Patience is only patience when it is the foundation of hope. Not when it is the pacifier of fear.
Hope is the currency of growth, whereas fear is what breeds decay.
To patiently await the decay of what we hold dear is not patience, it is surrender.
To hope, despite the apparent futility that stares us down, is the ultimate rebellion against fear.
To patiently persevere is therefore to continue fighting for that which brings us love and happiness, especially when the circumstances of our lives will warrant a surrender.
It is this beautiful patience that holds the promise of a heart filled with love, or a life fraught with pain.
When we lose sight of the outcome that we hope to achieve, we surrender to fear and settle for the familiarity of the pain that we once yearned to escape.
Surrender must never be an option.
Fa sabrun jameel…
Photo credit: Adobe stock
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #mybeloved #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #lifecoaching #counselling -
Trading off the best of me
If kindness and compassion are a reflection of who we are, there can be no prerequisite for anyone to have to deserve it, or to earn it from us.
How we express it towards them may take different forms, including tough love.
But it is our intention behind that tough love, and how we follow through with it, that determines if it was indeed inspired by kindness and compassion, or by anger or frustration.
The moment we expect someone to earn our kindness, respect, or any other virtue that we claim to possess, we lose that virtue and replace it with arrogance.
Arrogance is a result of a low self esteem.
There is no reason to demand recognition of our contribution if we truly appreciate the value of what we contribute.
Therefore, we diminish ourselves by trading with others that which we should be valuing within ourselves.
Express the beauty of you despite the bitterness of those around you.
It may be the very catalyst needed to break the cycle of your life that you so despise.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #optimism #zaidismail #lifecoaching #narcissisticpartner #narcissism #narcissisticabuse -
Understanding misunderstanding
When we find that, despite our sincerest efforts, we continue to be misunderstood, consider that perhaps we need to focus on understanding instead.
Understanding becomes difficult when we’re gripped with the desperation of needing others to understand how important something is to us.
That desperation is often driven by fear, or self pity, rather than conviction. And it’s fed by a belief that they simply don’t realise how important it is.
If we’re not careful, this is how we become the architects of our own misery, or the result of our own self-fulfilling prophecy.
The greater our emotional investment, the more likely we are to contaminate that space with fear or self pity.
Creating space for understanding is the most important thing you can do to avoid a potential lifetime of regret.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #relationshipgoals #companionship #soulfood #soulmates #selfawareness #mybeloved #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #narcissisticpartner #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #zaidismail -
Fear or hope? Choose wisely
Fear drives us towards protecting ourselves from a difficult past, while convincing us that we’re investing in a better future.
If we were truly investing in the future, fear of the past repeating itself would not feature in our efforts towards growth and new beginnings.
It is fear that manifests as illness or disease in our bodies, before any external threat overcomes us.
Fear robs us of what we have in the present moment.
When the present moment is lost, the future becomes a mirror into the past.
The cycle of fear is perpetuated as we find evidence of the past threatening to contaminate the future…and so the spiral continues until either it breaks, or we do.
When fear drives us, we look for, and find evidence that confirms our fears.
When we look for evidence that invalidates the fear, we’ll find reason to forge ahead with hope and courage, recognising that harbouring hope is already confirmation of our courage to rise above the fear.
What will you choose today?
#hope
#courage
#ownyourshit
#ownyourlife
#relationshipgoals
#lifecoaching
#zaidismail
#theegosystem
#motivation
#inspiration
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It’s not always betrayal
Betrayal is not always a result of harsh words, lies, or cruel action.
I’ve found that the deepest cuts were always from the silence when words were needed, the restrained sincerity when an embrace was called for, or inaction from those when I looked expectantly towards them while recalling the times they drew on my energy in the moments when I barely had enough to sustain my own spirit.
And I often wonder how many may look at me and feel the same way.
We’re often so focused on what we’re not getting from others, that we don’t pause to consider what they may not be getting from us either.
#mindfulness #inspiration #introspection #reflection #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #zaidismail
