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Definitely one of the most amazing motivators to start a war…the power of the nature of a woman to impassion a man will never be fully appreciated, except by the man caught under the spell of such persuasion. A woman…a real woman, can turn a man’s pleasure into agony and back into pleasure within seconds, simply through the utterance of a few words, or less still…simply through a gesture or lack thereof…such is the power they yield as the ‘weaker’ sex, and such is the fickleness of the poor sod caught in the dazzle of their beauty…

People that bat for the underdog are usually the underdogs in their own lives…only difference is, the courage they lack in fighting their own battles is what they muster up to fight for the underdog in other spheres of their lives. They do this in the hope that it will replace the lost self-worth resulting from their cowardice in situations where they lack the courage to be decisive in their own lives because it’s easier to comply than to resist authority under the guise of maintaining the peace.

Is it possible to be so in sync with another’s heart that even their hormonal imbalances can affect your own emotions? Most of my life I’ve focused on understanding the human psyche better, but i didn’t realise that my sense of compassion would predispose me to empathising more than I should with most of them…it’s only recently that I’ve been able to remain objective in the face of deep concern for another’s well being, without allowing myself to be caught up in the process of helping them out of their mire. However, this is not the case all the time…so maybe it would be more accurate if I said that only more recently have I been able to selectively remain objective, because as much as I try to walk away from a heart that is warm and engaging and so true to my own, I’m caught in a web of emotion that holds me ever more tight each time I try to break away…so I’ve finally accepted that resistance is futile…past the point of no return so much so that if I were to turn back now, I’d probably end up being more damaged than if the road had come to an abrupt end…neither of the two options being what I want, but always threatening to be realised.

But the fool in me is hopeful that what I’ve yearned for all my life may yet be realised in this lifetime, even if only in part…but a significant part at that. And this is what gives me reason, more than anything else, to rise each morning and face another day because hope is still alive and morbidity holds no attraction.

I’ve learnt that at some point the obvious will always reign supreme, whilst your dreams will fade into oblivion. The bite of reality is far more vicious than its bark. Don’t confuse ambition with dreams…they’re very different in so many ways…passion is what drives ambition…and when I’ve figured out what drives dreams, I’ll be sure to share that bit of useless information as well.

Update: Dreams are inspired by our insecurities…and our insecurities are triggered by our fears of insignificance, incompetence and stupidity. So we seek ways to build defence mechanisms to hide those fears so that no one else sees, and when we feel secure that we have that covered, we start dreaming of having someone close by that will accept us with those shortcomings so that the excessive energy that is expended to maintain those defense mechanisms can finally be focused on romancing someone that sees the beauty of our souls rather than judging our facade. A load of hog wash, I know…but you have to admit, it’s thought provoking…

Does it really matter whether you believe in someone else or not? Do we do it because we love or care for them, or is it because we hope that in turn they will believe in us? We live in a time when WIIFM (what’s in it for me?) is the order of the day, so to believe anything less would be recklessly naive, not so?

Without it, we tend towards defeatism, hopelessness and victim-consciousness…with it, we risk being vulnerable, needy or optimistic in the face of life…but I’d rather hope and be proven wrong on occasion, than to be hopeless and wait for life to happen to me by someone else’s rules. If I’m going to fade, or be defeated, I’m going to do it on my terms, and not on the terms of someone dictating what my happiness or misery should be.

Tonight a piece of my soul is leaving me to go on a sacred journey…and I pray that it will return in totality in 3 weeks’ time…as beautiful and amazing as ever. :'(

That’s my state of mind right now…empty…blank…zilch…nothing…nada…nought…dead…need some inspiration…soon…or else…flat line__________________

HAMSTRUNG! That’s the word I’ve been looking for…