Tag: Islam

  • My Guilt About Women in Niqab

    I feel extremely guilty but also bitter whenever I see photos intended to elevate the awareness and appreciation for women that wear niqab, and I despise myself for it. I’ve always held such women in the highest esteem. Living in a non-Muslim country, my respect for them was even greater knowing that they were establishing such modesty without anyone compelling them to do so.

    But after my absolutely close encounter with the hypocrisy and cowardliness that exists in these circles, it has tainted my views about niqabi’s in ways that have made it extremely difficult for me to reconcile my experiences with what could be a very different reality. Anyone that knows me will know that I despise generalisations, or holding people to account for something that they’re not responsible for. I also despise dragging people down if they’re making an effort to improve themselves while others are constantly focusing on their shortcomings. I’ve been on the receiving end for all of these trends, and it’s for these reasons, among others, that I despise my current state that leads me to feel repulsed at the sight of a woman in niqab. In fact, the word ‘despise’ is an understatement in this context.

    My negative experiences with women in niqab far outweigh my positive experiences, not because they were wearing niqab, but because of their actions and behaviours as individuals. So this is really a horrible case of memory by association that is really troubling me. I will let go of the association between my bad experiences and bad memories, and the act of wearing a beautiful adornment for women of modesty, Insha-Allah. But until then, this will always be a blatant reminder for me that the actions of those that appear overtly as Muslims can so easily taint the reputation of Muslims and Islam, and thereby drive others away from the beauty it has to offer, instead of inviting them through the simple acts that are beneficial and encouraged for us to practise.

    The same is true for men that dress according to the sunnah, wear the full length beard, adorn their heads with appropriate head coverings, and attend masjid for salaah with jamaah five times a day, and then swindle people out of money in order to make a profit, or beat their wives up out of frustration at the lack of their own manliness, or abuse the rights of their workers because they have authority over them.

    This is a pointless post, but Insha-Allah I’m hoping that writing about this for the first time in over a year since my horrid experiences with a niqabi in pursuit of a halaal marriage through halaal means will finally set me on the path towards putting that firmly behind me. It’s not a matter of needing to forgive, because that has already been done. It’s now clearly a matter of needing to forget.

  • Scholarly Debates Gone Wrong

    Here’s a very interesting article that a sister shared with me today. It provides some much needed context on the four madhabs. However, the most interesting part for me was the extended debates at the end of the article in the comments section. A few really important points that I liked are quoted below:Imam Al Qurtubi mentions towards the end of his commentary on these verses in hisAl Jami’ Li Ah’kam Al Qur’an:

    These people claiming to be fixing the conditions are only assuming so, while in reality they’re sowing corruption. Furthermore, the people of meaning say: “whoever makes a claim has lied”, which is true.

    Dr. Umar Faruq Abd-Allah had put it during the 2011 Deen Intensive Rihla in Turkey:

    The crisis of the Muslim community is a crisis of adab, i.e. a crisis of character and manners

    It’s narrated that a man came to Imam Malik and was trying to argue about a certain matter. Imam Malik quickly responded with:

    As for me, I’m in a state of certainty from my Lord about what I’m doing. As for you, you’re in doubt, so go find someone else in doubt like yourself to argue with

     

    Scholarly Debates Gone Wrong

  • The best of kings are at the doors of scholars, and the worst of scholars are at the doors of kings.

  • Withdraw from the opinions of people and seek to find the beauty in it all by exploring the truth yourself. If we allow the opinions and tainted excesses of others to shape our thinking, it is inevitable that we will feel suffocated and disheartened because excess goes against our nature, whereas what Allah has deemed fit for us is closest to our nature. Excess in anything, good or bad, will lead to more harm than good. Therefore, choose a path of moderation and awareness. 

    Don’t be tainted by man and assume that they are a reflection of Allah. That is a flawed perspective on which to approach life. Instead, reflect on Allah and see the true nature of man. The more you seek closeness to Allah, the greater your success at understanding man. The more you understand man, the greater your appreciation of the magnificence of Allah. 

  • Simple Challenge of an Average Muslim

    Many years ago I relocated from Johannesburg to Cape Town for a work contract. On my arrival in Cape Town, I found a place to stay in a predominantly non-Muslim neighbourhood since it was close to the office, and there were mosques within driving  distance. This was before the time of magnetometers in mobile phones, and I didn’t have a compass of my own yet either. So I used the rudimentary method of finding the direction of the Qibla relative to the position of the sun.

    I stood in my living room, plotted the path of the setting sun with my left hand, held my right arm out in front of me perpendicular to the position of the sun, and adjusted it slightly to the right to cater for the average of seven degrees east of north for the direction of the Qibla in South Africa. Seemed simple enough, so I performed my salaah at home facing this direction. I recall clearly using the gap between two mountains (Lion’s Head and Table Mountain) to note the position of the sun.

    Over the next few days, I found myself inclined to shift my direction to the right whilst performing salaah. Each time I completed my salaah, I felt a strong urge to move the prayer mat which I did. After about three or four days, this feeling settled, with my prayer mat now almost thirty degrees further to the right than where I had originally started. 

    That weekend I made a point of getting myself a decent compass. So I bought one in the Suunto range, which according to a friend that is an avid hiker, was a good choice. Upon using it to confirm my direction for the Qibla, I discovered that it was indeed in the direction I stopped at after moving my mat based on that feeling I had, and not the direction I had originally calculated with my arms. That moment was a truly memorable one for me. As simple as it was, it made me feel connected with Allah in a way I had never imagined. I felt guided. It felt good. 

    Later that year, as the seasons changed, I noticed that the sun didn’t set in the same spot as it did when I first moved into that apartment. I suddenly realised how little I knew of the wonders of nature, and how vague the statement is regarding the sun rising in the east and setting in the west. I guess more accurately, it generally rises in an easterly direction and sets in a generally westerly direction. 🙂 

  • Misconceptions of Taqdeer (Fate/Destiny)

    reflectionofhumblemodesty:

    A husband and his wife were standing in front of a mirror The wife asked: “What do you see?” The husband smiled and said: “The rest of my life..”
     
     
    Allah subhana wa ta’ala has already written the names of your spouses for you. What you need to work on is your relationship with Allah. He will send her/him to you when you’re ready. It is only a matter of time!!

    I find such statements very difficult to reconcile. My instinctive response is that it has to be a misinterpretation of the concept of taqdeer. It is based on the premise that a single partner has been intended for every single person. What then of those people that have married more than once and divorced more than once? It simply doesn’t add up. I love the idea of having that perfect person just waiting for the right time to walk into my life, but I know it doesn’t happen. I know this from experience on more than one occasion.

    It reminds me of the following hadith:

    One day Allah’s Messenger noticed a Bedouin leaving his camel without tying it. He asked the Bedouin, “Why don’t you tie down your camel?” The Bedouin answered, “I placed my trust in Allah.” At that, the Prophet, sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam, said, ” Tie your camel and place your trust in Allah” – Tirmidhi

    To me, taqdeer is more than just having everything set out for us regardless of our actions or efforts. Maybe I’m completely off the mark, but the more I consider it the more I believe that the whole issue of taqdeer is very misunderstood. The above hadith is a prime example of this misunderstanding.

    The fact that everything is pre-ordained I do not dispute. How it is pre-ordained is where the interpretations come into play, and again, as can be seen from the above hadith, it is not a predetermined outcome regardless of your actions. Within the context of the original post, what would you say to the person who has been married and after trying their hardest, ended up being divorced? Divorce, although hated, is halaal. So are we suggesting that even that is predetermined? If so, where does our accountability start and where does it stop?

    Or perhaps we’ve got this entire perspective on taqdeer all wrong. Perhaps taqdeer comprises of rules and laws that determine the effect of every cause, or the reaction to every action. Perhaps, within this context, our limited free will allows us to choose the outcomes based on our choices, and the more informed our choices, the more predictable the outcome? In the absence of this relationship between cause and effect, our limited free will would be inconsequential, and subsequently, there would be no basis on which we are to be judged for what we do.

    So isn’t this romantic idea of marital bliss and perfect partners really an over-simplification of divine decree?

    (Source: http://reflectionofhumblemodesty.tumblr.com)

  • Confused Thoughts…Strange Experiences

    A long many years ago I was approached by an old man that I didn’t know. It was after Isha salaah at a mosque that I didn’t frequent very often since it was outside of my neighbourhood. I must have been around 18 or 19 at the most at the time. Anyway, this man started chatting to me about a Shaykh at a local mosque not far from where we were, and he kept insisting that I should go there to become a mureed. I didn’t know what a mureed was, but I assumed it was a student or something. I disagreed with the concept and just nodded my head respectfully without any intention of following through.

    Many years before that, I was playing in our garden when I was still a child, and I saw a very old man with a thick white beard, very long, enter our yard. I don’t recall him talking to me, and I don’t recall anyone else being around either, but the lingering memory of that experience was a pile of white hair from his beard that was trimmed at the tap in our front garden. It just lay there almost dissolving away in the running water without anyone making a fuss of it. He disappeared. It never made sense, and still doesn’t.

    I once had a dream of strange over-sized chandeliers threatening to fall on me when I was trying to cross a road to get to my aunt’s house. I was scared. I kept dodging the path of the chandeliers that seemed to move along cables that my aunt controlled with some gadget she had in her hand. All this took place close to a farm town of which I have many fond memories from my childhood years. I don’t recall ever knowing the outcome of that dream. I was a child when I had that dream, but the imagery is still very vivid. Many years later, after I started working, I went to a local mosque close to where I worked, and saw chandeliers of almost exactly the same design suspended from a triple volume ceiling. I could never stop staring at those chandeliers whenever I visited that mosque over the years that I worked in that area. 

    Recently, I made acquaintance with some very intriguing personalities. The entire mureed issue came up again. I was exposed to some unfortunate experiences, and in seeking assistance to overcome it, I discovered that I could determine many interesting facts behind the incidents without having any real knowledge about them. A recognised and respected local Amil (one who is recognised as being gifted to be in touch with the spiritual world with which ‘normal’ people are unable to interact and who has the knowledge and ability to rid one of Jinn, Sihr, etc.) shared his insights with me about the conditions around my situation, and nothing he told me was news to me. This happened again with someone else. On both occasions, I shrugged off the suggestions that I apparently have a gift that puts me in touch with these unspoken facts, for lack of a better phrase.  

    I always went through life believing that my instinct about others was based on my acute sense of observation, which I honestly believed was a result of my introverted nature that allows me to recede into the shadows while observing the behaviours of others. I thought that this allowed me insight into the human psyche that most are too distracted to notice. I’m not so sure that this is the reason any more. 

    By the way, all my ‘instincts’ about the people around me in those trying circumstances that I experienced proved to be accurate either through the uncovering of evidence that confirmed it, or through actual admissions on the part of those that I believed were implicated in the under-handed dealings. So once again, I’m faced with the choice of choosing to be a mureed, which I am still not comfortable with, or potentially exposing myself to harm (if any of the research I’ve done is anything to go by) by not aligning with a shaykh/scholar, usually of the Sufi path. 

    I’m opposed to excessive interpretations of anything, regardless of madhab or sect or whatever. So the same prevents me from pledging allegiance to a specific shaykh in my endeavour to acquire more knowledge about this path that I’m on. But part of this aversion to excess is my inclination not to want to dismiss everything about any group just because some of their practices are questionable. This is a confusing space that I’m in, but I feel as if I’m on the brink of a spiritual journey that could greatly influence the rest of my life. This is truly a ramble, and isn’t nearly as cathartic as I hoped it would be. (I hate that word, ‘cathartic’. It sounds so superficial!).

    That there is a significant amount of mysticism entangled in Islamic knowledge is of no doubt. The advices in numerous ahadith to recite various verses or names of Allah towards healing people through unconventional means proves that there is merit in this way that I am being exposed to. The challenge is trying to determine how much of that skill is blameworthy as taught by the Jinn to man, versus how much of it can be used to benefit man. This is all very confusing. May Allah guide me in this troubled time towards the best outcome, Insha-Allah.

  • Begin with Yourself

    nowandthehereafter:

    A man went to Ibn ‘Abbas radiAllaahu ‘anhu and said, “O Ibn ‘Abbas, I want to enjoin people to do good and forbid them from doing evil.” Ibn ‘Abbas said, “And have you reached that level?” He said, “I hope that that is so.” He said, “If you do not fear to be exposed by three verses of Allah’s Book, then do so.” The man asked, “And what are they?” He mentioned this verse:

    Enjoin you Al-Birr (piety and righteousness and each and every act of obedience to Allâh) on the people and you forget (to practise it) yourselves.” (Baqarah 2:44)

    And then asked, “Have you applied the implications of this verse?” He said, “No.” Ibn ‘Abbas then mentioned the second verse:

    O you who believe! Why do you say that which you do not do? Most hateful it is with Allâh that you say that which you do not do. (As-Saff 61:2-3)

    After that he asked, “Have you applied the implications of this verse?” He said, “No.” He then mentioned the third verse regarding Shu’aib alayhi salaam:

    “I wish not, in contradiction to you, to do that which I forbid you.” (Hud 11:88)

    And then he asked, “Have you applied the implications of this verse? He said, “No.” Ibn ‘Abbas said, “Then begin with yourself.”