We lose ourselves to the bitterness of this world when we allow the self-loathing of others to define our self-worth.
In our desire to be understood, we willingly adopt labels that limit our expression of who we truly are.
It is a betrayal of the contract of kindness that we have with our soul.
The contract that compels us to treat with gentleness that which we cherish, and to handle with care those who cherish us.
When we allow the self-loathing that drives the bad behaviour of others to define how we feel about ourselves, we replace our gentleness with their harshness, and our care with their contempt.
The labels we use to convince ourselves that this bitter trade is warranted include convincing ourselves that we’re alone, that were powerless victims, or that we’re worthless unless our betrayer tastes the cruelty with which they treated us.
We hope to find significance in karma, believing that if we’re not avenged, then our experience was of no consequence.
To be of consequence, even to the most despicable, fills that void of self-worth that we created when we betrayed the contract of kindness with our soul.
Exhale. Release the toxins of a toxic past, so that you may fill your chest with the blessings that await.
#hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworthquotes #trust #betrayal #relationshipgoals #brokenheart #zaidismail #embracingME
Tag: zaidismail
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A bitter trade
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Be gentle…to you
When you treat the vulnerable or the gentle ones with contempt, you create the same monsters that made you.
The moment that we realise what we assume to be our nature is in fact a product of our upbringing, we’ll be able to make conscious decisions about who we want to be.
Sometimes, we place so much emphasis on respecting our emotions that we prevent ourselves from seeking answers as to our emotional response.
Humanness is not found in being infinitely understanding, but in balancing that understanding with decisive and purposeful action.
Striking that balance becomes more difficult when raised on a diet of self-doubt and fear.
That self-doubt and fear drives us towards paying forward what we may have received at the hands of similarly struggling souls.
Mindfulness about this state is the only chance of breaking that cycle of harshness or pain.
Be kind to yourself. Begin by seeking to understand what shaped you into who you are, so that you may be able to choose consciously who you want to be.
#kindness #gentleness #compassion #humanness #mentalhealth #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity -
Dare to dream
When we pursue the impossible, we achieve the unbelievable.
But, we’re often so distracted by how impossible our goal might appear, that we lose sight of everything that its pursuit offers us.
Fortune cookie wisdom tells us that it’s the journey that matters, not the destination.
Yet, we lose sight of the growth that the journey offers, and give up the pursuit of a seemingly impossible destination.
Today is a good day to take that step towards that impossible dream that you’ve been courting with for so long.
No time like the present, right?
#hope #expectation #dreams #goals #motivation #optimism #lifegoals #lifecoaching #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #pursuitofhappiness -
You are more than how you look
Taking pride in the colour of your skin or ethnicity distracts you from your humanity.
Our humanness, our gentleness, our inclination towards kindness – these are all part of our natural state.
It’s our need to be associated with significance or superiority that distracts us from this, and replaces it with the fear of being inadequate.
When we lose sight of the fear, responding from a place of fear becomes our new normal.
Everything that threatens the source of our significance – that is, our skin colour, religion, cultural roots, etc. – then feels like a threat to our sense of self.
Thus, we feel the anger, resentment, or blind rage that rises when we feel undermined because of the colour of our skin, or any other association that makes us feel significant.
In the absence of an awareness of who we are, it is inevitable that our external attributes will be all that feeds our self worth.
#racism #colourism #religion #culture #prejudice #bigotry #socialacceptance #herdmentality #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail -
Gratitude before regret
It’s impossible to be grateful for a blessing that you don’t acknowledge.
Like believing that we’re entitled to certain outcomes because of our effort or contribution.
Or believing that we’re entitled to be treated a certain way because we believe we’re a good person.
Whether those entitlements are true is not the issue.
The issue is that we are less likely to treat with due care and appreciation those things that we believe we are entitled to have in our lives.
Anything that is neglected in care or attention withers and eventually dies.
That’s how relationships deteriorate, and how our quality of life diminishes when we’re not paying attention.
Our absence of gratitude is therefore most often acknowledged only after the regret of the loss sets in.
Be mindful of what you have before you no longer have it.
#appreciation #gratitude #mindfulness #inspiration #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #motivation -
Gratitude is not the first step
Gratitude is all that matters, because gratitude is not possible without everything that matters coming before it.
Gratitude escapes us when we don’t respect the effort needed to achieve anything worth achieving.
It escapes us when we assume that we’re entitled to an outcome, without considering our contribution that is needed towards that outcome.
It escapes us when we take for granted what we have, because we’re always focused on what we don’t have.
To appreciate the effort, the struggle, or the commitment needed to create anything of value, we need to first recognise the sacrifice, the hard work, the consistency, and the commitment needed to develop the skills to gather the resources needed to achieve it.
For this reason, we all have something that we give to others for which they should be grateful, but sadly, we cannot insert gratitude into their hearts for it.
We can only contribute the best of who we are, and appreciate why we may not always be appreciated.
We cannot give what we don’t have. The ungrateful one lacks gratitude for who they are and what they have.
Expecting gratitude from such a being is therefore foolhardy, no matter how significant they may be in your life.
#gratitude #appreciation #hope #expectation #sincerity #selfworth #selfawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #theegosystem #ownyourlife #ownyourshit #embracingME #motivation #zaidismail #authenticity #leadershipcoach #optimism -
The absent parent
Even an absent parent is still parenting.
It’s then on the shoulders of the present one to compensate for that.
Sometimes, the absence of someone has a greater impact on us than the presence of others.
This is especially true for parenting.
The absent parent leaves the child with feelings of abandonment, insignificance, and a low self-esteem, to name a few.
Worse still, it tortures them with the hope that it could be better if only…while distracting them from embracing the life and love that they have.
It’s that unfulfilled hope and the failed expectations that become the burden of the parent who is present, who is still committed to the wholesome development of the child, to mitigate the impact of that negative influence.
While it’s true that the children suffer, not enough is done to recognise the impact on the single parent.
Because the human is often forgotten behind the role or the label that we assign to them.
#parenting #singleparenting #children #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #ownyourshit #ownyourlife #theegosystem #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #zaidismail #divorce #marriage -
Empathise
Empathy is expressed when we desire for others what we wish to have for ourselves.
Sometimes, it’s something we have, and we hope that others will be able to enjoy the same value and benefit that we enjoy from it.
Sometimes, it’s what we don’t have, yet we hope that we may be able to contribute towards others having it, despite having no reason to believe that we’ll be able to experience it ourselves.
Empathy is founded in our desire to alleviate our struggles that we see in someone else’s life.
That struggle could be something we currently experience, or something that we have experienced before.
It is core to our humanness, and only gets tainted when we respond with bitterness, hoping to see others suffer or struggle in the same way as we may have. Either at their hands, or at the hands of those whom they represent in our life.
Empathy is the difference between peaceful acceptance, and bitter vengeance.
Like that old proverb says, a bitter heart eats its owner.
Protect your heart from the bitterness of this world by practicing empathy instead.
#empathy #sympathy #compassion #gentleness #love #affection #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #selfworth #selflove #selfawareness #selfrespect #mindfulness #inspiration #zaidismail
