Tag: language

  • Me and my American wife

    Daughter: Daddy, mummy says the sandwiches are about to go into the press
    Me: Tell mummy it’s not a press, it’s a toaster
    Mummy: …

    The difference in terminology between what Americans call things, versus what we say in South Africa is quite amusing at times. My favourite so far has got to be the ‘hot water heater’ term that Americans use when referring to what we call a ‘geyser’. There’s many others, and I suspect that it will be the subject of a post that is entirely focused on exposing the ridiculous use of the Queen’s English by those that appropriated the culture and decided to call it ‘American’.*

    *And if you take that seriously, then you’re a dork! (Pre-emptive strike against trolls)

  • Word of the day…

    perspicacity

    (noun) The capacity to assess situations or circumstances shrewdly and to draw sound conclusions.

    I just like the meaning of this word and how pompous it would sound to actually use it in normal conversation.

  • Contaminated

    It’s sad that the moral decay of society has resulted in so many wholesome phrases becoming an embarrassing utterance no matter how innocently they may be stated. A few that came to mind this morning include:

    • “Bend over and take it like a man” – this was a common statement by friends and teachers alike when corporal punishment was still allowed in schools in South Africa, and I was due for a ‘6 of the best’ with the teacher’s cane. (Damn, even ‘teacher’s cane’ has taken on a different meaning these days!)
    • “We were so happy and gay” – another phrase that cannot be uttered by anyone that has no desire to want to be assumed a homosexual. We can effectively change the definition of the word ‘gay’ in the English dictionary to one that has explicit sexual connotations since no one in their right mind would use it to describe their happiness any longer.
    • “I’m going to walk the dog” – for those that may not be familiar with this awkward statement, specifically if uttered by a man, consider yourself blessed. 
    • “I gave my wife a pearl necklace as a wedding gift” – such a beautiful sentiment and profession of generosity defiled by the twisted mentality of society. Again, if you’re unfamiliar with this, consider yourself blessed, and I therefore apologise in advance if this post leads you to research the meaning of this. (btw, Urban Dictionary would be a good place to start!)
    • “I’m coming” – by far the most innocently used phrase that has led to far too many embarrassing moments for grown men with modesty, especially if yelled out from another room while a group of people were waiting for him to leave for some place.

    Sad, isn’t it? :-/