Defending myself into misery

Defensiveness is driven by a belief that you're under attack.Hence the need to defend ourselves when someone tries to correct us.The defensive response on our part confirms that we assume their intention to be other than genuine concern for what we're experiencing.We also assume that we must be right to feel a certain way, and... Continue Reading →

A brain dump

The obstinacy with which I once wrote, escapes me lately. It was an obstinacy borne from the absence of expectation. Self-awareness is easily distracted by familiarity that we may share with others. In a moment of inclusion after a lifetime of isolation, the self is quickly lost. Re-finding that which was lost becomes an arduous... Continue Reading →

Collective guilt, collective malice

One of the trappings of the victim head space is that it convinces us to surround ourselves with those who will understand why we're weak, or why we behave badly, because they themselves struggle with similar demons.Our need to avoid rejection or to feel validated causes us more harm than good.The comfort that we get... Continue Reading →

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