Pitying yourself into oblivion

Self-pity is an indulgence in futility that results from picking at our wounds long after the betrayal from another has passed.

Waiting for someone to care about us before we care for ourselves is not about needing them to care as much as it is about us wanting them to see how important they are to us.

If they respond positively, it boosts our self-worth because someone we care about cares about us.

While that may seem perfectly reasonable, it still means that we only care for ourselves if we feel cared for.

That’s not self-worth, nor is it love. That’s ingratitude.

Trading with emotions to test a significant other’s commitment to us is passive aggressive guilt-tripping and not love or affection.

It’s a transaction of benefit because we’ve lost sight of the value of who we are regardless of what others think of us.

Of course, the critical dependency in this is that our belief in who we are is based on substance and not wishful thinking, or self-aggrandisement.

Self-pity serves as a distraction from the life that we want, because it demands that we place our life on hold waiting for someone else to care.

That’s when ingratitude digs deeper into our soul and the self-pity soon becomes self-loathing because we failed the test that we administered on another.

Doesn’t make sense, does it?

Neither does self-pity.

Don’t wait for someone to value you before you value yourself.

Own Your Life.

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