Selective inheritance

Our relationship with our parents, whether they were present or absent, wholesome or abusive, will have a distinct impact on how we shape our character through life.

Not only will we develop our sense of self based on how we felt in their presence, but they are also our main point of reference in how to raise children, or show up as a partner to our spouse.

Whether you actively adopt or actively reject what you experienced with them, that becomes the grounding point that informs your decisions about what is or isn’t acceptable in your future relationships, and specially in your parenting style.

Judgement has nothing to do with it because knowing right from wrong or good from bad is easy.

There is no shortage of material and advisors to point out what or who is right or wrong.

Unfortunately, there’s a critical shortage of advisors to help us to understand why, despite knowing what’s right, so many of us struggle to do what’s right. Including our parents.

Connecting with the human behind the role, both in your parents and in yourself or your partner, reignites the empathy and compassion that judgement kills within us.

It is judgement that makes us harsh and rigid towards each other, while understanding breeds appreciation and compassion, if not affection.

Join me with panelists Hana Haths and Dineo Nomayeza Sibuyi on Saturday, 29 October 2022 at 2pm for an in depth discussion about this and other topics related to the gender wars that prevail in the SA Muslim community.

Tickets available at zaidismail.com at a nominal charge of R100 for in-person attendance and R60 for Zoom participation if you’re not in the Johannesburg area.

Refreshments will be provided.

Limited seating available so book now before the last minute rush.

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